On Love, Marriage and Polygamy

 

As with every other aspect of life, issues concerning love and marriage are largely based on personal convictions. Whether you believe there is one person alive who is your forever person or you believe in spreading the love, the fact remains that as human beings we are designed as creatures of association. We associate with other members of the society, church, school or family in order to get care, mentorship, approval for our actions etc.

Marriage can be viewed as one of such associations specifically designed to kickstart the family which is the smallest single unit of society. Marriage in many regions symbolizes the agreement between two persons who have resolved to merge their interests in such a way that makes it easier for each of them to achieve their life goals. This agreement extends to other members of the both families and is usually consummated to produce offspring in an organized manner.

In some traditions, it is common to find men with multiple wives or life partners. This is sometimes as a result of prevailing circumstances such as farming or warfare that may necessitate the need to have many children. Some religions have strict instructions regarding marriage. Most of them condemn polygamy and encourage monogamy. Some believe that a marriage continues even after physical death on earth. One could write long epistles about marriage, but I believe there are other volumes that have treated the subject very extensively. 

The purpose of this diary entry is to address my opinion on having multiple life partners. I think it is impossible and a wearying of self and spirit for anyone to try to complicate his life any further than life already is by choosing to build more than one family in a lifetime. I will explain why I think so in the summary below.

1. Do one thing, do it well, expect no mercy

2. Economic weariness

3. Emotional stress

4. Psychological mix-ups

5. Lack of total commitment on neither sides

6.  Human health limitations

7. Sexual stress

8. Chances of unwanted infiltration

9. No assurance of health status of multiple partners

10. Poor attention to all the kids from numerous wives

11. Possibility of religious dichotomy

12. Multiple distractions 

13. May breed jealousy and envy amongst co-wives and siblings

14. Favoritism will naturally creep in.

I will expand each of the points mentioned here in a future post, but suffice it to say here that none of the points mentioned above are necessarily religious based  or influenced. These to me, are simply logical reasons why I would not be opting for a polygamous marital arrangement. There are several religious backed points that could be added here, but at the end of the day, I think polygamy may also have its benefits and should a situation arise where one finds himself arm-twisted, it is not a completely terrible thing to enjoy the beauties of family living with multiple women in one life-time.

Let me know what you think about this topic and be sure to keep it civil and logical.

DO ONE THING, DO IT WELL - EXPECT NO MERCY

 

Life is simple, but we are overwhelmed by it on a daily basis. We seem to be on an endless clock that keeps moving whether we do anything or not. Life happens to us anyways, if we don't happen to it quickly enough. 

We don't know when we'll be done here, none of us knows his exit date, time or location, It can happen any moment, from the time you wake up in the morning to the time you lay down again in the night. There is no guarantee that everyone who woke up today will go to sleep again this night. Yet we make plans for 10, 15, 20 years time as if any part of it was guaranteed. We brag and carry our shoulders up as if we are anything. We look down on others and judge everyone else but ourselves. We refuse to help others on their own life journeys as if we were already done with ours.😃😃

Each of us have our unique challenges, its a full time job to figure them out and solve them on a daily basis. The lessons we learn while at it enriches us, the mistakes we fall into purnish us harshly and the clock continues tick - tack.. tick - tack 

For anyone who even bothers to think, it is crucial to figure out what you are doing here on Earth and what you want to leave for the next generation when you are gone. Of course, we already know that we don't take anything material from here when we pass on. We just go as light as we come, no baggages at least not physical. We have also come to understand that material belongings are perishable and only have relevance or value on this material plane. If this is the truthful case, then whatever we acquire here and now, cannot be ours forever. 

So what do we do? 

Our existential realities and conditions differ largely along lines of culture, religion, location and temperament. We are consistently under intense mental, physical, sociological, economic, cultural and religious pressure. Some people are lucky to figure out their way through these pressures and contain them, others are torn apart trying to even understand what is going on. 

We build institutions to help us calm the pressures, we join alliances (cultural and religious) to assure us that we are not alone while at it and ultimately we struggle to pay bills to continue living.  Money has become the biggest agent of control, It appears the more of it you have, the more able you are to contain your own pressures. Everyone strives to acquire more of it, in order to stand a chance to master our existence and liberate ourselves from suffering even if the acquisition causes pain to us and others.

What's more, even time has been equated to money. You spend time to get money and you spend money to buy time. It appears we are all rich in time, but not so equal on money.

Whatever is going on, we are in an intelligent system. The universe is a training school. There are lessons everywhere we look. Most of them come in disguise. We are not only living, but we are also learning. The natural laws of existence ensure that there is always a balance in the system. 

We don't know how for sure, but we can live each day as if it was our last. We can try to do one thing, do it well and expect no mercy!